You learn more from your mistakes than your successes.
So here I am to try, and to fail, so I can learn.
Paul Fail. For The Win!

08 July 2010

#FridayFlash: Jack and Jill Hook Up

Friday Flash
Jack & Jill Hook Up
©2010 D. Paul Angel

Jill went to the bar feeling old, tired, and fat.  The last few months had taken their toll, and she was hoping for something different.  Just some connection with some reasonably decent guy to re-light her fire and get her out of this rut.  At least that's what my friends all think...

Jack looked in the mirror, popped his collar, unbuttoned just one more button so his gold chain shone, and headed for the door.  Tonight is Jack's time to shine!

They each found their way to Mulligan O'Shamrock's, a borderline bar just on the other side of the gentrification line.  The lighting was just dark enough to make everyone look more attractive, but not so dark as to make you look too close.  Neither had really picked it by chance.  She was already at the bar, sipping on her Appletini when he sat next to her and ordered a Fosters.

They talked.  Hesitatingly at first, but then with a bit more ease.  Well, he's not a complete douchebagYou are the MAN Jack! Whoo! Hottest woman at the bar and YOU are talking to HER! then aloud he added, "I'm sorry I couldn't I hear you."

"I said, 'I should probably be going.'  I have work, you know."

"You wanna join me at Jack's place?"

Oh God, did he just refer to himself in the third person she asked herself, though all she said aloud was "Jack's?"

"You know: me.  Jack," he replied, flashing his best grin.  Don't forget the nod.

What the Hell.  At least I won't hesitate leaving in the morning.


Jack paid for both and left a paltry enough tip that he earned a sneer from the bartender on their way out.  They walked to his flat slow enough that it didn't seem like they were rushing, but fast enough that she wouldn't have time to reconsider.  I am so glad I did the dishes and hung some of those little smelling tree things where no one would notice.

I can't believe I'm going with him.  Although, if he was a serial killer, he would be a Hell of a lot smoother.  And I have always wanted a Jack...

He opened the door and let her.  Good God there must be dozens of those damn little car trees stuffed everywhere.  I wonder what he left out that stunk?  She tried not to look too close after that.  I wonder how many Appletini's she had?  "Tequila?" he asked with a sly dog affect.

Anything.  "Sounds good."  After downing a couple shots of Cuervo, she followed his looks to the bedroom, and soon enough was following.  He caught her eye over his shoulder, stopped, turned, and began kissing her up against the wall.

Whoa... well at least he realizes there's more to my body just boobs.

I can't believe she's letting me feel her up!

Never mind.

She pushed him away, but not too hard.  She pulled at his shirt, got it off, and then maneuvered him towards the bed.  I'm in this far, let's just get this over with.  After varying degrees of success she was finally starting to enjoy things.  It really has been a long time she admitted to herself, allowing her to relax enough to enjoy his attentions.

"Like that, baby?" he whispered huskily in her ear.

Well I was... Sort of... But, Really?

"Shh.  Don't talk."

"Okay.  Yeah.  Quiet.  I like that.  Yeah."

Shut up, Jack.

Shut up, Jack.

His efforts increased and she felt herself atop a precipice just about to plunge into a whirlpool of fiery passion when it just stopped.  That's it?  Godfuckindammit!

"I know what you're thinking," he said, laying down next to her, "but we're not done." She needs a man to take care of her, a real man.

Thank God he noticed!

"Don't worry baby, Jack'll hold you all night."



  1. Oh nooooo. Poor Jill. What a... disappointment!

    "Mulligan O'Shamrock's" is probably the best name for a bar I've ever heard, by the way.

  2. Ended feeling pretty bad for Jill, even if "he noticed."

    Mulligan O'Shamrock's is one of the more ridiculous names for a bar I've heard, which earns you points with me.

  3. Jen and John-

    Thank you both for posting I greatly appreciate it!

    I felt pretty bad for Jill, too. Especially since I created her and her poor life. What I maybe should have done was reverse the roles. I was thinking about people's perceptions of themselves, and how common it can be for the incompetent to rate themselves competent, and the truly competent to rate themselves incompetent. So you have Jill, who is with it enough to identify the problems at each step, but continues on because of her lack of confidence.

    And you have Jack. Who has absolutely no business with her, but thinks much higher of himself because he is. So, doing it opposite might have made it far better.

    I laughed out loud while trying to come up with a bar name and Mulligan O'Shamrock's came out. If I ever win the lottery, I might just have to open one!


  4. All Jill has to do is get dressed and skedaddle!

    So Jack fell down and broke his crown, but Jill did not tumble after, huh. :)

  5. Marisa-

    Jill not only did not tumble, but was wholly un-impressed with Jack's attempt at showboating :-)



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