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You learn more from your mistakes than your successes.
So here I am to try, and to fail, so I can learn.
Paul Fail. For The Win!

07 October 2009

A Prologue of Paradoxes and Extant Confession

Hello world.

Science Fiction, SciFi, is full chocked full of stories involving time travel.  Some are funny, some are sad, most or complicated, and all to one extant or another deal with the idea of paradoxes.  After all, it is within the realm of the paradox that the greatest potential for conflict, drama, and character lies.

As a kid I used to think how cool a time machine would be.  I could watch the armies of the Roman Empire sweep across the European continent, view the dinosaurs in their majesty, or watch humanities descent with the ver popular "Fast-Forward Button."  Or to the future, to the Stars, to "stange new worlds, new life, and new civilizations;" or to see whether our Nations crossroads leads to a Utopian paradise, or Dystopian nightmare.

But I'm older now, and a little wiser.  And what I would actually use that Time Machine for is to go back in Time and kick the Young Me in the ass.  Tell him to quit wasting the disposable income when he had it on fast-food and always eating out.  To take chances, but not the stupid ones, and, most of all, I'd tell him that if he absolutely had to day-dream, the very least he could do would be to write them the Hell down so at least He would have something to show for his imagination.

"Hello world," is the classic, some would say, "cliched" first program all new coders to a language write.  It is a program whose sole function is to write the words, "Hello" and "world."  It is a starting point, a foundation.  It is that which you need in order to build upon it; and it is what i always walked away from.  I had the time, the money, and the interest to take programming classes 10-15 years ago.

Yet I never did.

I wanted the programs in my head working now, but all the programming classes required prerequisites.  I didn't want to wait that long, so I stubbornly refused to take them.  Which meant, that I never did end up taking those coding classes, which means that, it's still on the list of things I need to learn; only I no longer have the time, nor the money. So yeah, Young Me, that's an ass-kicking.

The same is true of writing as well.  I never wanted to be one of those people who spent my time at Writer's Workshops.  To be fair, some of this was due to my distaste for the few published authors I met in College, but that is a far larger digression, and one worthy of its own entry.  So I dreamed; I created intricate worlds, fascinating plots, and rich, full characters.  And I left them, for the most part, completely and utterly locked in my head.

Until now.

I realize some of what I was doing.  Some of the deep-seated insecurities that led to self-sabotage.  That some of the procrastination and laziness was really avoidance of the difficulty.  And, most of all, how I let fear make my decisions without ever having manifested itself.  So, now that I have realized these things, it is time to change them.

This blog is part of that.  It is my own spot on the web on which I can share my struggles, at least as best I can.  I can also share my observations about writing in specifically, and the larger craft of Storytelling in general.  Mix in some Whisky, my fascination with the fairer sex, and all of the sudden you have yourself a blog!  And, most importantly, an external means of accountability to help enforce discipline.  (Which is also worthy of an entry in its own right.)

Finally, as for why the opinion of a professed slacker is worth anything, who is the more honest; he who has confessed his sins, or he who is yet denying them?

2 comments:

  1. I don't think I ever really thought about what I'd do with a time machine.

    Now, I certainly have no clue. I'd be totally paranoid to go back or forward in time. I've seen Back to the Future too many times. :)

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  2. Sam: "It's your kids. There's something horribly wrong with your kids!" Or at least that's how I remember the ending of the first Back to the Future;-) I can't help but think that, if any of us were truly given a time machine to use, that we would probably be too awed by its power to actually use it.

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Thank you for taking the time to comment, I greatly appreciate it. Kind words are always nice, but please do not hesitate to give me criticism as well. I want to learn and write better, and your critiques are a huge help in that. Thanks!